Something I’m seeing a lot is the statement “I’m not distancing myself because of political differences, I’m distancing myself because of moral differences”

Anyone who is happy at the expense of others losing rights, is not different from you politically, they’re different from humanity, as far as basic ethics.

You’re not selfish. You’re strong. Stronger than me and I’m proud of you for trying to fight to help your dad, but please don’t do it at your own expensive. I’m pan and non-monagamous but buried further in the closet than a cable that “definitely will be useful in the future” because my family would turn on me in a heartbeat.

If you’re capable of sustaining yourself then it would be wrong to maintain contact with that person.

We’ve experienced the Trump admin before, we’ve seen the news about what he is doing, anybody who still supports that asshole if beyond lost: they’re the enemy.

“Dad, I can’t do this anymore. You do you and I’ll do me and let’s touch base again in 4 years.”

My parents are nowhere near as deep in the rabbit hole, but I’m essentially dark on communications with them at this point. Once they have convinced me that they are fighting against the current state of things, I’ll re-engage. Currently they are unaware of this fact, but it won’t be too much longer until they realize that I have no time or desire to interact with them anymore. They will have to choose and I’m at peace with either outcome at this point.

I should not be involved with people who turn a blind eye to fascism.

Full stop.

I’m sorry to say that you already know what you have to do. There’s no easy way to do it other than to just do it. If it makes the process easier, you don’t have to pose it as “it’s me or them” because you already know what his answer will be. If he was going to change, he’s had plenty of opportunities already.

Don’t wait for him anymore. Live YOUR life.

It sounds like your life will be immeasurably improved by cutting him off. But it’s such an intense, personal decision that I’m not sure any internet stranger could honestly say one way or the other.

Its necessary. Do it.

I believe that if someone is supporting policies that are directly impacting your quality of life/well being you’re well within your rights of cutting that person out and telling them to fuck off.

This goes beyond “politics”. What kind of garbage person puts the well being of 2 handfuls of rich failsons ahead of their own children? Well, my parents for one, and your dad for another it seems.

Before cutting them out, I recommend putting it in terms similar to this. Emphasize how they have failed at the basic premise of being a parent by putting their own children’s wellbeing behind that of about a handful of the wealthiest families on the planet with more resources than god. Literally subsidizing these strangers failsons at the expense of their own children.

Nope, I almost did it, but he stopped pressing my buttons. He thought “grab em by the pussy” was funny, kept talking about trump. Told him the exact same thing I told the ex friend I did cut from my life: I don’t associate with Trump supporters, either cut that shit out or lose my number.

They have a right to believe what they want, I have a right to distance myself and not speak to them. Their morals are fucked, I will have no part of it.

Nope. Do it. I did. It’s rough at first, but it gets better over time.

You won’t miss him. You’ll miss the idea of who he was, but then you’ll realize he was never the person you grew up believing in/admiring.

Sometimes you grow up and your dad stays your hero. Other times, you learn he’s a narcissist misogynistic selfish small minded person.

Cut people like this out of your life.

No. I ended my relationship with my mother for voting for him a second time. She saw the harm he caused. She knew the harm he would cause to people I love. She is willfully blind to his faults. I can’t tolerate that anymore. Neither should you. Cut the cancer out and don’t look back.

Obviously, your mental health and well-being and that of your partner are the first consideration. Please do whatever the two of you need to survive the times.

That said, when I read, “it’s either me or these beliefs/trump,” I wondered how you would have reacted if your dad had said you have to choose between him and being gay/your partner. I assume you might have shut the door in his face, felt good about it, and never looked back.

I doubt he’ll feel any different about it.

Your mental health must come first. You can’t fix others if you’re broken.

Lol, these comments saying it’s selfish.

Selfish would be pushing that trump hate in your sons face.

Just like cheerleading the federal job massacre when both of your kids are feds should get you ghosted.

I would only spend any amount of time around him that you feel you want to, as someone who feels that way, you owe them none of your energy.

You don’t get to always be in someones life. That’s not a constant. If you act like an asshole, that person may simply decide for their mental health to get rid of you completely. And that’s on you.

When people make mistakes, they apologize. But when someone is just telling you who they are, listen.

While you could try to deradicalize him, you absolutely don’t owe anything to someone who not only has failed his duty as a parent to support you, but also actively opposes your rights.

(also, reminder that there is no such thing as a ‘Roman’ salute)