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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: June 5th, 2023

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  • So a few weeks back it’s been officially confirmed I’m being made redundant.

    I had a job interview last Friday - late stage. I’m hoping they come back with some positive news. The interview went okay. I think I did well with the Java stuff, but when I was asked about Javascript Event Loops, I was completely befuzzled.

    Back at work, and we all have to act like we give a shit. Not too great, I wish I was done with the company overall.

    Luckily I have another job interview next week - something to look forward too!

    Overall, a pretty resounding “meh”.





  • It’s funny. When I saw this last night, I was in such disbelief that I was watching the real trailer that I was nitpicking all the way going “Nah, this looks bad, R* wouldn’t do that. That looks too good for a GTA game” etc until I double-and-triple-checked the links and went “oh”.

    Now I’ve had a few hours to digest:

    • The buildings and environments look absolutely beautiful
    • It seems to be running at 60FPS? Thank goodness
    • The characters look… waxy… I will say that black characters look absolutely phenomenal - much better than previous entries
    • This whole game sort of feels like “GTA V+”, which makes sense. Unfortunately, I’ve overhyped myself to a level that R* could never achieve. Not really R*'s problem, but still a bummer.
    • Looking at some of the social media/news freeze frames, it seems a lot of the satire’s edginess has been toned down a lot. Honestly? Thank goodness. GTA V was nauseating in how much it was trying to be a shock-jockey. However, I hope R* will still have its political leaning. Even if I don’t agree with R*, it (usually) is something of substance and is usually somewhat grown up (with exception of GTA V)
    • I would bet money that GTA VI will be delayed to 2026.
    • It will be interesting to see how the writing will be now that Dan Houser has left. It seems OK so far.
    • Everyone’s faces look so expressive except for the two main characters. They just look kind of robotic

    EDIT: One massive thing I forgot - the marketing for this was so stupid. R* kept saying “Upcoming Grand Theft Auto title” as if it wasn’t going to be called “Grand Theft Auto VI” like they called GTA5 “Grand Theft Auto V” and the one before with roman numerals. Like, for goodness sakes guys, get over yourselves. We know it’s going to be called Grand Theft Auto VI.




  • I didn’t really consider 2D indie games. For 3D indie games, some games are cut down while others are “good enough” to the average Switch end user.

    At the end of the day, if the ability to play 3D games from about 5-10 years ago in 30-60fps sounds like a dream to you and you are willing to jump through some Launch Properties/Proton version hoops for some games in order to get that perfect gameplay (for example, I have GTA 3/Vice City/San Andreas OG games, and I spent days modding the games on the SD to get it running close to flawlessly as possible) rather than settle for compromised ports - which for the average person playing video games, they wouldn’t care too much about framerates or graphical fidelity as so much as the convenience to push Play and just go), then Steam Deck is for you.

    Otherwise, Switch is perhaps preferrable. OR, if you care more about visual fidelity more than anything, maybe consider getting a PS5/XSX. I say this as I do love my Steam Deck for GTA5 sessions, but for RE games I often go to my XSX.


    • maybe some games you don’t want to spend time tweaking the launch options, the graphics, the sliders, the mods etc and you just want to play the game as the devs intended. Switch is good for that.
    • maybe there are times you don’t want to deal with all the hassles of a handled pc as a gaming system. Switch is good for that.
    • maybe you want to play Nintendo games, but you don’t want to go through all the hassle of emulation (especially switch games). Switch is good for that.
    • maybe there is an indie dev you want to support, and you know their game is more expensive on switch than on pc, but it’s well within your budget and you want to give them extra coin. Switch is good for that.
    • while switch games are generally low fidelity and low frame rate, you know what to generally expect going in.
    • maybe your group of friends mostly own switch and play switch online compared to steam.

    Truth be told, once I got my steam deck, I sold my switch. Not because the switch was terrible by any means, but I realised that I missed my pc game library, I didn’t care for online multiplayer, and I didn’t care for Nintendo games. Also, I grew up with Linux and tinkering both Windows and Linux - it’s in my blood at this point, so getting a steam deck was just pure joy for me, even if I spent 90% of the time configuring the thing and 10% playing games.


  • Backpack: maybe not, but as long as it doesn’t wear off. For example, I got myself an anti-theft laptop backpack (didn’t even realise it was anti-theft when I bought it lol) and it was £25. I’m not going to pretend it has the utmost premium of materials woven into the backpack or anything, but honestly? It’s not absolute crap either and it’s still going one year later. All my other bags have been the same - not the most premium materials (prob. pretty simple stuff) but it does the job and sticks around forever.

    Screwdrivers: So I found a ratchetng screwdriver for £21 - which comes with the bits (unlike from what I can see in LTT store, they seem to be sold separately!!!).

    As for “professional grade”, I have searched and searched online for an exact definition for what this could even mean for a screwdriver (because the implication is that other screwdrivers are Fischer Price plastic screwdrivers or something, which is absolutely hilarious to me and I kind of wish it was true) and I get wildly varying definitions (and that’s from the ones I could even find. The most I can work out is that it had more random bits - which I think my example provides (with torx etc). If it has something to do with the “materials” of the screwdriver, then I will say I cannot remember a single time in my life when a screwdriver has broke on me. Generally I buy them (no matter how cheap) and I have it for life.

    And yes, just because something is cheaper, doesn’t make it better. But just because something is expensive, doesn’t mean it is naturally better too. Clothing and quite frankly the backpack is incredibly subjective, so I can appreciate we don’t see eye-to-eye on it. But the screwdriver? The LTT screwdriver is such blatant markup on standard screwdrivers that it boggles my mind how anyone could defend it. If they were something along the lines of $30-$40, i would think “yeah, they’re expensive, but it’s clear LTT has got to eat and the people who buy it are clearly supporting the channel” but at $70 it’s practically robbery as an artform.

    Fun fact: When I was trying to find the words “professional grade” (hint: couldn’t find it) on the screwdriver page for the LTT store, I noticed this disclaimer text in the product description:

    NOTE: Bits are a consumable item and will wear or break down over time. Visual wear to the black phosphate coating is normal and expected.

    Now, to be fair, this is true with my cheap-o screwdrivers with the interchangeable bits too. However, I didn’t fork out lots of money for the privilege.





  • So I have phenylketonuria, and a big part of this is being in tune with my brain and my mental/emotional/physical well-being as to try and gauge when my phenylalanine levels are high.

    Since I’ve had my phenylalanine levels so low, I was able to correctly find out my levels were high.

    As to catastrophising, unfortunately that is a symptom of high phe levels. I’ve been working on lowering my phe levels, and today was the first day I didn’t feel any anxiety or catastrophe despite starting something 24h support at work today for a week.




  • Seeing what folks have said, I kind of feel bad griping about my own issues, but as of now I have nobody else to really talk to (or at least that’s the way it feels), so here goes:

    • Work has been up and down. It has been super stressful and intense at times - especially on Mondays, and then calms down as the week goes on. It doesn’t help that we have half our team members and next week our team lead is going on holiday. And next week is going to be the start of support, where I’ll need to be available 24/7 (it’s a thing, and apparently it pays super well and also can help for a promotion)
    • I bought a house in March and things are still ongoing from the sellers side despite being virtually done on my side. This wouldn’t be so stressful had it not been for the fact that I have a mortgage offer that will expire at the end of October, and given how the seller wants 4 weeks to paint their new house before I get the keys(!!!) that means I’ll need to factor the 4 weeks into the expiry and eventually consider putting my foot down and pulling out (which I don’t want to do, but interest rates have drastically changed in the UK, so I’m unlikely to have an extension or the same offer again)
    • A few weeks ago I got shingles, and I had medicine for that (stress from house and work). Went over to my sisters and she started talking to me about the foot fungus she saw on my feet as well as fungal infection behind my ear. The behind-the-ear requires a shampoo, so that’s simple. The toenail fungal infection requires toenail clippings as well as blood test to check my liver. Yesterday the results came back slightly borderline for my kidneys, so I’m going to have to repeat the results (also I have to avoid alcohol and eat more fruit). At this point I can’t help but feel like my body is a Rube Goldberg machine and while it’s nice that my sister is spotting these issues, it just makes me feel slightly depressed about my body.
    • The weather in the UK as well as the health issues has left me a bit house bound, and more importantly, I feel incredibly lonely.

    But on the plus side:

    • I have a very, very well paid job that seems to actually compensate me for the effort I put in - much, much more than my last job
    • I have a genuinely very caring family that wants the best for me
    • I’m lucky to live in a time when I can just write this post and several strangers will see it, even if they don’t respond. In some ways, the loneliness is much more in my head
    • I already ate 3 bits of fruit yesterday and I had one before my dinner (this is actually quite a big deal for me) :D
    • I’m self aware enough to spot when I’m catastrophising and (hopefully) I can make an active effort to nip it in the bud. Sometimes its easy, and other times it’s mentally exhausting.
    • I’m sure there are others out there who are doing much worse with taking care of their bodies than me.
    • I am not depressed yet. I may have bouts of anxiety through the day, but I think this is manageable.