So who are the good guys, mind you telling? As far as I’m aware, currently it’s a choice between Chromium based browsers and Firefox and its forks. So really just 2 options in the grand scheme of things.

5800K is not white…

Says who?

…(relatively equal amounts of all visible light wavelengths)

That's the keypoint, relatively equal. You're comparing black-body radiation temperatures but at no temperature is the spectrum actually constant across the frequencies which we call visible light. So which temperature you choose to call "white" is up to how you decide to define it. And because our eyes have different sensitivity for different frequencies, I doubt that even if you produced a perfectly constant spectral power distribution of visible light, that you would perceive it the same as what you call white on the diagram. Not to mention such a light source could be harder to find than you might think.

If you don't believe me, you can start on Wikipedia and from there go down the rabbit hole that colors and color perception are.

White light

(…)
A range of spectral distributions of light sources can be perceived as white—there is no single, unique specification of "white light". For example, when buying a "white" light bulb, one might buy one labeled 2700K, 6000K, etc., which produce light having very different spectral distributions, and yet this will not prevent the user from identifying the color of objects that those light bulbs illuminate.[30]

Interestingly, you can define what a perfectly white object is, with the caveat that what frequencies in what ratio actually hit your retina is again dependent on the light source.

White objects

Color vision allows us to distinguish different objects by their color. In order to do so, color constancy can keep the perceived color of an object relatively unchanged when the illumination changes among various broad (whitish) spectral distributions of light.[30]

The same principle is used in photography and cinematography where the choice of white point determines a transformation of all other color stimuli. Changes in or manipulation of the white point can be used to explain some optical illusions such as The dress.

While there is no single, unique specification of "white light", there is indeed a unique specification of "white object", or, more specifically, "white surface". A perfectly white surface diffusely reflects (scatters) all visible light that strikes it, without absorbing any, irrespective of the light's wavelength or spectral distribution.

It’s called white, but you can see it’s pretty clearly blue

It's more complicated than that. "White" is a completely made up term, it has no physical basis. Colors are a perception, they're not physically real. We just gave labels to some frequencies of the electromagnetic spectrum and their different combinations. And just like a camera, the human brain uses white balance correction to compensate for the fact that in different times of the day, the sunlight reaching us here on Earth has different color temperature (because it travels through different thickness of atmosphere), and by extent to compensate for different color of artificial lighting. So what our brain perceives as "white" is much dependent on context. It's how the infamous white+gold/blue+black dress illusion works. It's why when you put on ski goggles with orange lenses, the snow looks yellow at first but becomes "white" after a while. Then you take them off and the snow becomes momentarily blueish before it balances to white again. You can also force yourself to have the white balance temporarily out of sync in each eye.

If you printed out your chart and looked at it at different times of day or under different lighting conditions, what you'd think as neutral white would change too. So you can't really say which white is the "true white", it's all relative.