one of the upsides to being diagnosed with a disorder is finally getting all the in-jokes :P
did they give you any medication? i was diagnosed at 18 and took ritalin for a while. then i raw-dogged it for a couple of decades and recently got a new prescription for concerta, which is apparently what they changed the name to when ritalin became a bad word. i have to show id and sign a form every month which is wild, and it costs far more than i think it should. i just wish it felt as good for me as it supposedly does for people with normal brains - but at least i’m doing my dishes and laundry again.
everyone has their own advice, so i figure i’ll pop out a small turd of mine. take it or leave it.
there are two Yous: there’s NowYou and FutureYou. they’re bad coworkers who work opposite shifts. NowYou keeps leaving to-do notes for FutureYou, but it just pisses off FutureYou because NowYou didn’t do anything during his own shift except for write the fucking to-do note. the answer is clear to the question: which one is the bad employee?
you are NowYou, obviously. but the real challenge now presents itself. NowYou has pretty much only ever written to-do letters. really good at it now, actually - full of justifications and excuses and resignations - and life for NowYou is actually pretty good when you think about it. and it could only be better, too, if it weren’t for that arrogant prick who hasn’t been introduced yet: PastYou.
PastYou is a fucking loser. can’t even fucking vaccuum the house once it’s started playing minecraft. PastYou is the reason you’re eating saltines because it’s 2am and you fell down a yt rabbit hole and didn’t notice that it was too late to go get some groceries.
NowYou is a pussy
FutureYou is a dick
PastYou is an asshole
To quote Team America:
“See, there are three kinds of people: dicks, pussies, and assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along, and dicks just want to fuck all the time without thinking it through. But then you got your assholes. And all the assholes want is to shit all over everything. So pussies may get mad at dicks once in a while, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes! And if they didn’t fuck the assholes, you know what you’d get? You’d get your dick and your pussy all covered in shit!”
edit - i don’t know if my attributions for the three yous correlates to the others correctly. but whatever, it’s not like i’m getting paid for this shit
one of the upsides to being diagnosed with a disorder is finally getting all the in-jokes :P
did they give you any medication? i was diagnosed at 18 and took ritalin for a while. then i raw-dogged it for a couple of decades and recently got a new prescription for concerta, which is apparently what they changed the name to when ritalin became a bad word. i have to show id and sign a form every month which is wild, and it costs far more than i think it should. i just wish it felt as good for me as it supposedly does for people with normal brains - but at least i’m doing my dishes and laundry again.
everyone has their own advice, so i figure i’ll pop out a small turd of mine. take it or leave it.
there are two Yous: there’s NowYou and FutureYou. they’re bad coworkers who work opposite shifts. NowYou keeps leaving to-do notes for FutureYou, but it just pisses off FutureYou because NowYou didn’t do anything during his own shift except for write the fucking to-do note. the answer is clear to the question: which one is the bad employee?
you are NowYou, obviously. but the real challenge now presents itself. NowYou has pretty much only ever written to-do letters. really good at it now, actually - full of justifications and excuses and resignations - and life for NowYou is actually pretty good when you think about it. and it could only be better, too, if it weren’t for that arrogant prick who hasn’t been introduced yet: PastYou.
PastYou is a fucking loser. can’t even fucking vaccuum the house once it’s started playing minecraft. PastYou is the reason you’re eating saltines because it’s 2am and you fell down a yt rabbit hole and didn’t notice that it was too late to go get some groceries.
NowYou is a pussy
FutureYou is a dick
PastYou is an asshole
To quote Team America:
“See, there are three kinds of people: dicks, pussies, and assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along, and dicks just want to fuck all the time without thinking it through. But then you got your assholes. And all the assholes want is to shit all over everything. So pussies may get mad at dicks once in a while, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes! And if they didn’t fuck the assholes, you know what you’d get? You’d get your dick and your pussy all covered in shit!”
edit - i don’t know if my attributions for the three yous correlates to the others correctly. but whatever, it’s not like i’m getting paid for this shit
Past me is glorious…it’s not nostalgia, I have amazing charts to prove it.